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Dan Brown, lollipop sticks and wellie-drilling

Posted by Dawn Isaac on 24 Oct 2010 at 04:12 PM

I have done some really stupid things in my life before.  There was that ditch-diving incident when my Dad told me to take my feet off the pedals of my bike and I heard it as "take your hands off the handlebars", and the time I was trying to get my parents attention by standing inbetween them… whilst they were throwing bricks, not forgetting the day I crossed the road in front of a bike, or the one when I did the same in front of a car (I became such a regular at the hospital, I was invited to their Christmas party). 

However, these things were linked by a common factor.  I was very, very young.

I kind of thought I’d grown out of such nonsense.

Until last Thursday.

Because that was the day I drilled my own leg.

Which hurt… quite a lot.

But weirdly, that wasn’t what I was thinking about.  No, my first thought was “if this starts to bleed uncontrollably, will I be able to construct a tourniquet quickly enough to still pick up the kids from school?”.  And secondly, “if I have to go to A&E should I lie about the fact I was drilling holes in wellies?”.

Yes, this was a wellie-drilling injury.  Surely, one of the least impressive or glamorous injuries. (Actually, that’s not really true.  I’m sure I read somewhere that there are a handful of deaths each year caused by simply “putting on trousers”.  Then again, I may well have made this up...)

I would like to point out that this injury, while undeniably stupid, is all in a good cause. In fact it was part of one of 35 projects I’m attempting to prepare for my first ever book.  

This tome (which I imagine is already getting Dan Brown worrying over his share of the book market) is supposed to marry real gardening and my Blue Peter-esque obsessions with cutting, sticking and recycling household objects.  As a result there will be a certain amount of planting in non-planters and, consequently, quite a lot of drilling.  In fact, so far this week, I have drilled a ceramic teapot (slow, slow work), wooden wine boxes (a doddle), rubber wellie boots (soft and slippery) and, of course, my leg (very painful, but not A&E gruesome thanks to the stopping power of denim).

Next week I shall be concentrating on planting bulbs and lollipop stick fencing.  It will be safer.

Comments

EvaInNL said:

What will you be planting in the stump Dawn? :o)

on 03 Nov 2010 at 01:31 PM